Most people know the definition of the word authoritative as being commanding, assertive or assured and it often has a negative connotation. However, the other definition means reliable, dependable, trustworthy and I would like to talk specifically about the authoritative parenting style.
In the late 60s, a psychologist called Diana Baumrind introduced the authoritative parenting style which is widely seen as the most effective style of parenting. An authoritative parent listens to their children, encourages their independence, makes them understand the consequences of their behavior and expects them to learn from their mistakes. They express warmth and nurturance, allow them to express their opinions, encourage them to discuss options, and they administer fair and consistent discipline.
In other words as a parent you have to be well balanced in how you treat your children. You do not want to punish them to the point that they can’t approach you when they need advice and neither can you back off to the point you become negligent and they run wild.
This is what I learned from a biblical point of view.
1 John 5:14
“And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us.”
As an authoritative parent God hears us, He is attentive to our every need, regardless of how small they are. He pays attention to everything about us, and to every word that comes out of our mouth. Therefore, as his children we must be brave enough to ask Him for what we need.
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
As children of God we are very special in His eyes. We have not only been called to Him but chosen by Him and He encourages us to be dependent on the Holy Spirit and not dependent on man. God’s expectation of us is to trust and believe in him. He expects that if we trust in him then we will be successful in every venture we undertake. The same way a parent extends forgiveness, God does the same, as long as you are truly repentant.
“Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.“
God extends an invitation to us to come and express our opinion and discuss options with him. He wants us to draw near to him with everything that we’ve got and let him work in and through us. God is a loving and nurturing parent. He wants to express his love for us in lots of ways. He wants us to come and rest in his presence, basking in his unfailing love.
My mother died when I was too young to get to know her and because I had to go to school far away I didn’t live with my father for a very long period of time so was raised by my sister. My father was one of the kindest men I ever knew and even though I did not live in the traditional two parent home, God gave me comfort during difficult moments and courage in times I felt afraid.
Therfore, if you are one of those people who feel “left out” because you did not have a parent or guardian to raise you then give God a chance because He knows what is best for you.
Review of authoritative parenting style was retrieved from https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-authoritative-parenting-2794956